In our church, we often remind people that our community is imperfect because it’s full of imperfect people seeking to learn more about a perfect God. And if someone thinks it’s perfect, the minute they join, they’ll make it imperfect too!
The key to experiencing an incredible life full of meaningful relationships isn’t dependent upon filling it with perfect people—it’s dependent upon developing unity. This isn’t easy; it’s a battle, but it’s worthy because of what it produces.
There are four keys to developing unity and forming the bond of peace: humility (our treatment of others’ perspectives), gentleness (our treatment of others’ interests and emotions), patience (our treatment of others’ development), and forbearance (our treatment of others’ flaws).
Each is vital, but forbearance might be the hardest for most of us. Why? Because imperfect people are frustrating. We should know—we are one!
Jesus was an incredible example of how to deal with imperfect actions, forbearing with others continuously and helping them become all they were meant to be.
In Luke 22:54-62, at their Last Supper together, Peter professed his loyalty to Jesus. But Jesus told him that before the rooster crowed that night, he would deny Him three times.
Sure enough, when the soldiers arrested Jesus and led him to the high priest’s house, Peter followed at a distance, then stopped to warm himself by a fire. Several people identified him as one who had been with Jesus, but he denied it—three times.
Jesus’ response to Peter shows us how to “bear all things” (1 Corinthians 13:7).
First, forbearance withholds judgment about people’s flaws. After the rooster crowed, verse 61 says, “The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter.” He could have yelled or ignored him. Instead, He simply acknowledged him. When others need our mercy most, like Jesus, we should give it.
Second, forbearance helps people overcome their flaws. It doesn’t just encourage—it stands with them as they develop. Jesus demonstrated this with Peter many times throughout their relationship. When Peter boldly declared he would walk on water, then began to sink when his faith wavered, Jesus didn’t let him drown or scold him for his doubt—He immediately reached out, caught him, and used it as an opportunity to develop him gently.
Third, forbearance inspires faith in people about their future. Jesus showed this with Peter after the resurrection, appearing to him by the Sea of Galilee and giving him a chance to recommit while encouraging him in his purpose (John 21:15-19). When others fail us, we should inspire them that their tomorrow can be greater than their today, reminding them we’ll be with them all the way—even when they stumble.
When we choose forbearance, we become vessels of God’s grace and step into the joy of loving like Christ. As we learn to continuously bear with one another, we cultivate the relationships Jesus desires for us—rich in love, lasting in impact, and fruitful for the kingdom of heaven!
